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- Use it as a fancy tablecloth in your dollhouse living room.
- Buy .3 gallons of gas.
- Buy REO Speedwagon's The Hits at your local 7-Eleven.
- Buy a newspaper. Make a hat out of the newspaper.
- Hold a hooker's hand.
- Get 30 seconds of high-resolution "full-contact" Web chat time.
- Put it all on red.
- Get an all-day parking pass in downtown Steubenville, Ohio.
- Buy a new doorbell button.
- Trade it on eBay for a different dollar.
- Buy enough yarn to knit your hamster a beach towel.
- Get a small bag of fortune cookies. Then brag to your friends that you have a small (bag of) fortune (cookies).
- Make a lightweight two-inch telescope (1X powered).
- Buy enough breadcrumbs to go for a walk in the forest and not get lost.
- Get 100 pennies, go to a fountain, and make 100 wishes for more money.
- Make a testicle cozy (you'll need two dollars for two cozies).
- Scratch and win your way out of your shithole life.
- Make a three-second phone call from a hotel room.
- Pay off all your debts in Mexico.
- Make some origami. Sell it for more than a dollar to some retard who likes origami.
- Eat it. Then laugh as you shit money. (Don't eat it again.)
- Buy a dozen used roses.
- Fly a tiny kite.
- Use it as homemade Q-tip.
- Treat your girlfriend like a cheap stripper.
- Level a wobbly table.
- Save an African’s life.
- Get a black or white photo, from a picture booth.
- Buy 20 empty aluminum cans. Fill them with urine and then sell them as cans of energy drink.
- Leave four messages on your answering machine from a pay phone.
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